Hello, Here is a question for all of you. What do you do when your child won’t stop taking food from the pantry and hiding it in their room? Please read and answer the different questions that come up and add questions of your own that you may need help with so we can all get ideas from each other and help each other. My example: My 17 year old hides food and wrappers under his mattress even when he knows we will find it. HELP!!! —-Susan D.

A public thank you from a friend in the UK

To David Durovy & Bryan Post

Whom sent me copies of Bryan’s books, “From Fear, To Love” & “The Great Behaviour Breakdown”, both by email and hard copies by post.

Thank you so much.

I doubt many people in the UK will have heard of Bryan Post or the Post Institute (http://www.postinstitute.com/) but Bryan is clearly a generous man and a man of passion and a special understanding within his field. All parent’s, whether of adopted children or whether biological parents, should read his books and watch his videos. The world is a better place because of people like Bryan, who truly understands the importance of love, compassion & understanding.  The books are not available through Amazon UK (and should be!!!) so if you are a parent, whether adoptive or not, and want a copy then approach the institute directly.

Amazon UK do have “Beyond Consequences Logic and Control” which is co-authored br Bryan.

I believe the single most important thing for the future of humanity, is working towards a true understanding of our nature, and Bryan is definitely one of the knights on that quest.

Sir, you have my utmost respect and gratitude!!

 

“Bryan, I want to be one of the parents you talk about…”

A story from the Great Behavior Breakdown by B. Bryan Post. Read more about the specific ways you can reduce challenging behaviors like this at http://www.postinstitute.com/store/books.html.

In the middle of one of Bryan Post’s lectures, a woman stood up and said, “Bryan, I want to be one of the parents you talk about.” Everyone in the room laughed, including Bryan, and he said, “I want you to be one of the parents I talk about.” This was a grandmother raising her granddaughter. She said, “I’m going to try this stuff, and I’ll let you know how it worked.” Months later, she showed up at another lecture and said, “I’ve got something to tell you. The day after your lecture, I picked my granddaughter up from school. It was always a bad day be-cause she never wanted to leave. She always gave me defiance and back talk. But this day, I walked in and was going to be calm. I got there early and was breathing, and I said, ‘Honey, it’s time to go.’ And she started in with the same dynamics as usual, so I said, ‘Grandma feels scared right now.’ My granddaughter stopped, looked at me, and said, ‘Grandma, what are you afraid of? Are you scared someone is going to hurt me? Are you scared someone is going to hurt you?’ I said, ‘No, honey. I’m scared because every day is like this, and the evening is like this. And we’re not having a very good relationship.’” Her granddaugh-ter looked at her and said, “Grandma, everything’s going to be okay.” And they walked out of that school hand in hand. “That was the best day we have ever had,” she told Bryan. All of this happened as a result of: Reflect, Relate, and Regulate.

None of this is easy to do and sometimes you have to stop yourself and ask the question, “Is what I’ve been doing working?” Most of the time the answer is no, so you’ve got to change your parenting paradigm.

Choose love…